Too Young to be Married they Said

Too Young to b Married they said, But I have loved every bit of our life!

I was 23 when we got married, my husband was 22. Now at almost 25, still many of my friends are not married. Leading up to the wedding, I can’t count how many times I heard, “you are too young to be getting married.” Most were  just incredulous that I am now an adult. But, really did think we were too young to get married. “Why rush?” they would say?  I never thought I was in a rush. This was just how life was progressing for us. After all, my parents were my age when they got married. We had both graduated from college, I was finishing up graduate school, he was about to leave for Fort Benning. Although let’s be real, the military did not make it easy to slow down either. So what was I to do with all these well intended people that might as well been saying, you’re making a huge mistake. But here I am just after our first wedding anniversary and I can’t imagine this being a mistake.

I have always been told that I am one of those people that are easily swayed by what people say. I like for others to think well of me, I constantly worry about what people might or might not be saying about me. So I was a bit surprised at myself that I couldn’t find any anxiety in me when people would tell me I was too young. Maybe it’s because all the anxiety I could muster at the time was being thrown at my school work. Or maybe it’s because I finally realized that despite what people said about me and our relationship it wasn’t going to affect me. Why wait if I knew this was the person I wanted to spend my life with? What did it matter to Joe Schmoe when I got married? That’s right, it doesn’t.

So here is what I have learned about marrying young!

1.We can’t compare ourselves to the other people around you!

Just because we are doing something different doesn’t make me right and them wrong. When we compare ourselves to others we often find ourselves in discontent. Like the saying “You do You” We have to do what works for us. Most of my friends who are in relationships are content to wait for a while before getting married, due to being in the military, that wasn’t going to work for us or else I couldn’t move with him. But marriage works for us!

2.We get to experience so much together!

I have a friend who is almost 30 and celebrated her 1st wedding anniversary a few weeks before B and I did! When we talk she always wishes they had met earlier and were married younger so they could have had that time together. I will be 25 when we celebrate our 2nd anniversary! We have so much to do together!

3.Less comparison between partners!

While my marriage was not my first relationship it was really my first adult relationship. I don’t get caught in the trap of comparing B to past boyfriends or relationships. And neither does he! It makes our lives so much smoother!

4.Regardless of how old we are; we get to spend our lives together!

No matter how old or young you are when you get married, the best part is getting to spend all my life with B! We get to do all the parts of having a family, being a family, and building a family. We get to adventure and make new memories, we get to have all the experiences, we get the highs and lows of being together.

As I reflect on age and marriage, to me maturity is more important than age. Age is a number that might not reflect a lot! But having a mature spirit, forgiving and gracious and a loving heart is all that is needed to make the marriage work, a lifelong commitment to one another, I made that commitment at 23! And I couldn’t be more happy with how my life is!

Too young to be married they told me, but I have loved every minute and wouldn't change it!

18 thoughts on “Too Young to be Married they Said

  1. I got married at 23 (3 weeks shy of turning 24) and my husband was 24. We’ll celebrate our first anniversary this summer, and honestly I am SO glad we got married when we did. Everyone said we were rushing things– and maybe we were; we got married 13 months after meeting– but Andy and I do not regret it at all.

  2. What a lovely post. I love this, I was married at 17, my husband was 22! We will celebrate our 27th anniversary this year. We can honestly say that we grew up together. Like you said there is never a discussion about ex’s in our house, because we were each others high school sweetheart. I wouldn’t trade anything for those early years, they were truly special. It is so nice to read of younger couples making such strong commitments to each other. Congratulations!

  3. I got married at 24 (just 2 weeks shy of turning 25), and I didn’t feel young at all, at the time. In fact, I remember congratulating myself for “waiting” to get married, because so many of my friends married right out of college. In retrospect, both my husband and I agree that we were really young (he was 24 as well)–but we also agree that we wouldn’t do anything different, even if we could. We grew into our adulthood together, and I think that has helped us maintain our relationship for the last 28 years. I can just barely remember a time when this guy wasn’t beside me.

    1. So many of my friends I had prior to living in a military community aren’t married, so most of my college friends. But Now being an Army spouse, I everyone I know is young and married! Such a difference!

  4. My husband and I knew we were made for each other pretty much at 16. We got married at 19. He was in the Air Force, and after that he went to school for medical assisting. I didn’t finish college. We are now living in Alaska (we’re from Florida) with three kids. I’m turning 32 this year. I don’t regret it! Every trial we’ve faced was only more bearable because he was by my side, and every decision we’ve made has only made us stronger because we have each other’s backs. No regrets. Love doesn’t mature or suddenly become unselfish with age; it happens by choice. We have chosen each other every day since.

  5. You definitely need to be you and not worry about what others do. I think people get married at different times, for different reasons. You got the amazing wedding when you were ready for it.

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